hello baby belly! (& pregnancy dreams)

I've popped!

At least I think that's what it's called… All I know is that suddenly I look SUPER pregnant. It happened about a week ago and my husband is very excited about it :) It certainly helps make everything seem real finally!

I even have this amazing waddle going on some days…

As far as what else is new and interesting:

• The kicking is getting STRONGER, and while I was taking a breather and watching some House of Cards on Netflix the other day, I saw my belly move! 
• Flipping over in the night is getting more and more difficult, which basically just means I find a position and stay there until morning.
• Pregnancy dreams are getting SCARY-REAL.

Let me take a minute to emphasize that last bullet point… because honestly, pregnancy dreams are CRAZY! They are so vivid and it becomes hard to differentiate them from real life.

Here's one from last week that had me waking up almost in tears:

I was standing in a church with our families and Ryan, minutes from

getting married. The ceremony started, and I could see Ryan's

anxiety level going up by the second. He started getting really hot

and took off his jacket AND his dress shirt, so he was just standing there

in a t-shirt, super sweaty. 

Apparently I took this as a sign that we shouldn't get married and

I called off the wedding…

Flash forward to a year later, I'm driving in a car with the window down, 

hair blowing, alongside the perfect soundtrack 

(again, this WHOLE dream felt (and looked) like a movie…), 

in the middle of nowhere. I pull up to this beautiful cottage home and, as if

 I were Rachel McAdams in The Notebook, I knew immediately that this was

 the dream house I told Ryan about back when we were together. 

He had built this beautiful home in the year after I left him at the altar.

How much more Nicholas Sparks does it get, really…

I spent the next little while exploring the beautiful deck and eventually 

went into the house to see that everything was more or less finished, 

except it wasn't furnished. As I explored the basement, I heard a noise upstairs

 and when I came up I saw Ryan standing in the kitchen with his back to me.

I said "babe…"

He turned and just looked at me in shock. 

Before he said anything, Andrew came in and said "what the hell are you 

doing here?" He was obviously super pissed at me for what 

I did to his best friend. But what makes this really adorable is that it was clear
that Andrew moved in with Ry after the wedding drama went down and took
they both quit their day jobs to build this house. 
What a bro.

I said "I'm back," never really taking my eyes off Ryan.

Andrew told me I needed to leave and literally tried to escort me out the door,
but Ryan said if I came back for breakfast tomorrow morning, we could talk. 

Sad movie-music played while I drove home. 
Not knowing how our talk tomorrow would go... 

I woke up convinced that a) I was single. b) I had ruined the best thing in my life. and c) Andrew was super mad at me. 

I'm not kidding, I had tears in my eyes while Ryan showered and I had to convince myself that that wasn't my life…that I hadn't backed out of our wedding and that thankfully, reality was all happiness and rainbows. 

I only wish I could show you how dramatic this dream was, and also how beautiful everything looked… I've obviously chosen a fabulous director for my pregnancy dreams! 

Also, ever since that dream I've pictured Ryan as this super-handy house builder man. Apparently all that's standing in the way of his construction-genius is our relationship. Now I joke with him that he should just build our next home because he obviously knows how… 

P.S. Here's the finished baby shower invitation! To see more photos click here :)